23andMe Results

Dear Kids,

This is a follow-up post to 23andMe. Back in December Daddy and I spit in to little tubes and sent our DNA into the great unknown for analysis. 6-8 weeks later the results are in! Here is the good, bad, and the bizarre of what my DNA told me:

The Good
– No elevated risk of pancreatic cancer (Yay!)
– No elevated risk of melanoma (Super yay! My grandfather died of this)
– No elevated risk for Glaucoma (I guess I’ll have to think of another way to get my medicinal pot – harhar)
– I am genetically inclined to be taller than average (Me Amazon!)
– Elevated risk of…FRECKLES! (Duh.)
– Reduced risk of atrial fibrilation
– Reduced risk of alzheimer’s (WooHoo!)
– Reduced risk of Depression (Shiny, happy people everywhere!)
– Increased production of HDL (The good cholesterol)
– Both your father and I are Duffy-positive. This means we are malaria resistant (and since both of us are, so are you two. You’re welcome.)
– Your father also found out that he is naturally resistant to not only malaria, but tuberculosis, pneumonia, and strep (Lucky dog…)

The Bad
– Significant risk of breast cancer (Guess I need to keep an eye on the ol’ girls. Daddy said he’d help, isn’t that nice?)
– Risk of age-related macular degeneration (Boo. More carrots for me.)
– Significant risk of developing Type 2 Diabetes (Super boo. Whatever, I’m still eating that box of Hot Tamales I just bought)
– Risk of developing crohn’s disease (Joy.)
– Caffeine sensitivity (Legit.)
– I have lower levels of vitamin D (I knew it. The sun hates me.)

The Bizarre
(Background: From all of my genealogy research I can confirm that I cam significantly German, English, and Irish. Possibly a skosh Swiss. So, you’ll understand why the following was surprising)

– I am 0.1% Mongolian (What the what?)
– I am 0.1% North African (BET, here I come!)
– I am 4.9% Ashkenazi Jew (This just validates how much I use ‘Oy’.)
– I have poor short term memory (Seriously – there were three genes pointing to this! I think I need a t-shirt that says ‘hi!’ on the front and ‘I don’t remember you’ on the back.)
– I have good long term memory (…but I will remember you in detail ten years from now.)
– I am 7x less likely to respond to certain antidepressants (Well then, it’s a good thing I’m not genetically prone to depression!)
– I have a gene that says I have increased creativity (Who was looking for that??)
– I am a red-head carrier (Duh.)
– I am genetically inclined to NOT learn from my mistakes the first time (Your father is having a good time with this one.)
– I am genetically inclined to have less empathy (I would argue with this, but who cares…)
– There is a gene called the worrier/warrior gene. It’s similar to the flight/fight response. I am a ‘worrier’/flight. Your father is a warrior/fight. (Not one of my prouder genetic moments, but there it is.)
– I am genetically inclined to birth large babies (Great. It was my fault after all.)
– I have better body odor than average (it should be noted that this information was provided with the words: you should still use deodorant. I can’t decide if the program is being a smart ass or providing a public service.)

So, that’s it! I’ve also been using the program to track down some relatives and attempt to solve a family mystery. I’ll let you know if we make any headroom on that. Until then, it’s all fun and games until someone finds out they stink – on the genetic level.